Third Places: Don't Be Fancy
The Grove Cafe, Ames, Iowa. Your anti-Instagram-worthy diner since 1948. A breath of fresh (i.e. real) air.
Regulars abound here, and you can often see their photos on the fridge.
We’ve arrived at the final official quality of Third Places, according to Ray Oldenburg, and this might be my favorite one.
“Make sure the actual environment isn’t fancy or pretentious.
Third spaces should keep a low profile. “
There are a couple of reasons that this is vital, namely that third places should feel like home.
And since most of us don’t live in museums, this means comfortable and maybe a little shabby, so you’re able to be fully yourself while being there.
The benefits of this are endless.
Most folks feel at ease in less formal situations, unless you are, say, Lady Mary Crawley.
And if a person is more at ease, they tend to be more themselves, and more open to connecting with other folks.
Cafe Sperl, Vienna, Austria. This has been a happening third place since 1880.
If you’re gonna be fancy, at least dress it down a bit with loads of newspapers scattered about for folks to read.
Shabbiness also tends to deter what Oldenburg called “the transient middle-class”, or people who are on the prowl for the latest “it” place to increase their own social standing and blast themselves all over the internet.
Think of this as sort of anti-cocktail-party vibes. Or goofy-cocktail-party vibes.
Because when you’re looking to increase your own social standing by being somewhere, you’re probably not all that interested in authentically connecting to other folks.
You’re definitely less present.
And professional networking is not authentically connecting to other folks, in my humble opinion.
Greenhouse on Porter in Ocean Springs, MS, circa 2019.
I’ll also say that add that shabbiness can also be more sustainable.
I would imagine that places that wear out their decor, instead of constantly revamping their “brand”, are less wasteful, more thoughtful in their resource use, and likely save a bit of cash.
Mugs at the Grove Cafe. Of course they are secondhand and don’t match.
An Unofficial List of Anti-Fancy Qualities:
Stuff. These are not sterile, lifeless places. Things abound.
Color. No monochromatic palettes, or black/white only.
Textures. I tend to think emotional warmth is communicated by fabric, upholstery, warm and fuzzy things, but I am also open to debate on this one.
Mismatched, homemade, random, second-hand. Basically don’t worry too much about matching/not matching.
Warm lighting. Ain’t no hospital.
Plants.